You know, you walk so many steps, you stop, and you look around. You take in your surroundings, note down the little details subconsciously in the back of your mind and let out a sigh. Whether it's discomfort or pleasure is up to you. And everyone of us. But for me, it's discomfort. But it's a discomfort that I understand. And from it, know that I somehow have to work around it. But most probably i'll let myself become swamped by the mish-mash of shitness that comes with being a resident of this godforsaken planet . What's the point of this update? I don't know really, but think Lester Burnham mixed up with 'Quiz Kid' Donnie Smith. That's how i find myself feeling like lately. Sure we have our bad days, but at least when you can acknowledge them as bad days and also realise that they could be even worse, now THAT'S life. And if they do get worse? Learn from them. Cry from them. But most of all don't blame yourself. It might just be that you were in the wrong place, at the wrong time. But hey, again, that's jazz. And think about it, if you weren't in that place, someone else would have been, learning the lesson that you could have. It's all about experiencing different things at different times. Some of us do it early, some later, some never at all. But whatever our paths, they're always there for a reason. But it's not one of those fucking pathetic, "Everything happens for a reason!" reasons that just go unexplained. these reasons you WILL see, because if you didn't see them, how would you know they had happened?

The following song is a beauty, and if you feel like being enlightened, ask me to send it you on msn at auto2112@hotmail.com (I wonder if anyone who reads this DOESN'T have me on MSN...)

Crowded House - Love This Life

seal my fate
I get your tongue in the mail
no one is wise
until they see how it lies
love this life
don't wait till the next one comes
pedal my faith
the wheels are still turning round, turn round
and maybe the day will come
when you'll never have to feel no pain
after all my complaining
gonna love this life
gonna love this life ...

and so they threw you in jail
whatever you've done
it was a million to one
and don't you just love this life
when it's holding you down
pedal my faith
the wheels are still turning round, turn round

and maybe the day will come
when you'll never have to feel no pain
after all my complaining
gonna love this life
gonna love this life ...

there's something that you can do
even if you think that I hate you
stop your complaining, leave me defenseless
when you love this life
gotta love this life
love this life though you'll never know why
gonna love this life
gonna love