I was just looking at some of the homes and mansions on sale over on ebay.co.uk/.com, and I was so jealous. Not of the person because they're selling it, but because they HAD it. Have you seen some of the homes on sale on there??? Fuck me, there's like, places there which you could fit 6 of my house into, for a 'cut-price' fee of one and a half million dollars. I would LOVE to live in a huge home like that. A big fuckoff mansion, where I could have a room dedicated to my DVD collection (If I had all the money in the world, i'd go out and buy EVERY DVD I see fit to join my lovely collection), have a games room for all my consoles, stick a few arcade machines in there, a pool table, etc. I'd have a big fuckoff swimming pool, with a lovely slide, and those rubber mats that the lifeguards at Peter Lloyds would used to tell you you couldn't have because of all the fucking hassle they'd cause. I'd have, i'd have, i'd have...

If ever i'm lucky enough to be rich, too damn right i'll get a big house to compensate for my small penis. As Marty McFly says in BTTF1, "Someday Jennifer, someday..."