A friend of mine is having a break with his girlfriend, she requested it. Now, what SHOULD a break mean, and what should it accomplish?

RULES OF A BREAK

1. Go away and with the free time you've now got, consider where your relationship is going. Take into consideration, where you've been with it, where it is now, and where it MIGHT go. If things seem bad, figure out possible solutions to remedy the problem.

2. Take as much time as you need. Whether it be a week or a month, if you need that much time to sort your head out, do it.

3. Don't think because it's a break that you can run around like Don Juan and pull as many ladies / laddies as possible before you return to your partner.

4. Take into consideration that if it's you who's asked for the break, that this break is possibly going to be interpreted as something TOTALLY different to your partner. They didn't want it, didn't ask for it, and have to step back while you figure out what you want. It's not unfair to ask for a break, but at least let them know why you wanted the break at all in the first place. It's easy saying, "Oh, I need a break. Why? Because I do." Basically that says to them that you're just fucking bored of them at that time and fancy a bit of a 'single' laugh.

5. Finally, whatever you do, try to be reasonable. if you've asked for a break, sat there for two weeks and done fuck all only to then tell your waiting partner that it's over, then you're quite simply a twat. If at least you can come back, tell them it's over, AND provide an adequate reason, it'll help ease their mind. Splitting up with them after they've been waiting for weeks biting their nails without any justifiable reason, borders on twatness, cuntness, and shiteness to me. At least think the whole situation over. You'd be surprised what you can realise with a bit of prodding of the old grey matter.

Why have I done this? because I have experienced breaks with both my ex girlfriends, and in both cases they weren't easy nor did they end up with positive results. Also, the 5 rules above aren't directly related to me. For instance, no.5 isn't what happened in any of my breaks, but I know for a fact that it DOES happen out there. If you're guilty of no.5, FUCK OFF. I couldn't give a shit about you, and you can die of gonorhea of the nose for all i care. It's a low thing to do, and I have no time for people like ol' no.5.

To the friend who's currently having to undergo a break from their partner, hang in there. Breaks are tough, but it IS possible to come out of one smelling of roses, and having an even better relationship than before. I'm not saying you WILL come out of this break better. I'm a realist. Shit happens. I should know. Believe in me, and you'll understand a little more about life as a challenge than you ever did.

And on that, I ask you to watch the film 'Delicatessen'. YES, it's another foreign film, but it's my fave foreign film AND it stars my fave foreign actor, Dominique Pinon. He was the dude in 'Alien resurrection' with that cool wheel chair.

Au revoirski...