Way back on the 15th of August 2000, I posted a review on www.gamefaqs.com for a game that would become the death of me. The game in question was Perfect Dark, and the system of choice was the Nintendo 64. I didn't enjoy the game. I thought it was too slow, too similar to Goldeneye (Which isn't that bad a thing but still some originality would have been welcomed.), and I also thought the graphics were way too blurry. Since that review, I have received in excess of 30 e-mails, all from people criticising, calling me and my review gay (they really did call a review gay), and also lambasting me for simply using the right to freedom of speech. Here's the link to the review...

http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/n64/review/R11006.html

Read the review? Here's 2 e-mails i've received in the past week and my honest response to them.

From :
Tom James

To :
auto2112@hotmail.com

Subject :
Good review.......

No, i'm just kinding, your review for Perfect Dark was gay. The whole time you just sit there and talk about games for the PC. Sorry to tell you but Perfect Dark for for the N64 not the PC you dumbass, so shut the hell up about your gay PC. Of course the graphics and sound are not going to be as good as a game on the PC, but for the N64 they kicked ass. And you say the it Perfect Dark is a remake of GoldenEye, but if I recall 007 was voted game of the year...GAME OF THE YEAR!!!!. Thats over all platforms, including your gay little PC. Personaly, I think the game was just to hard for you thats why you have to sit here and whine about it. Crybaby "Look at me, I can't get past the first level, boo hoo hoo, Mommy come change my diaper, that bad guy scared me, waaaaa, waaaaa!!!!"

Ahoy Tom,
Ya not the only person who thought my review was homosexual. I’ve had quite the tirade of abuse over the years for that review. Still, it’s all been funny and has been good material for my web-site. Anyway, about your e-mail…
1. I’ve already pin-pointed the gay thing. You say a review of a video game is gay. Think about it.
2. I do not just sit there talking about games for the PC. On the other hand, the users on the Perfect Dark message board sit there and consider Perfect Dark the ONLY FPS available. Like it’s the only one they’ve ever played. That’s why I kept bringing up the PC games because they are a hell of a lot better than console based FPS’s. The one exception would probably be Metroid Prime tho my review was written when Prime was merely a glint in the eye of Nintendo.
3. Perfect Dark IS a remake of Goldeneye, and regardless of the accolades Goldeneye received, you can’t say Perfect Dark is amazing just because it’s prequel received so many awards. Goldeneye was revolutionary, Perfect Dark wasn’t.
4. ‘gay little pc’. You seem to have a hell of a problem with homosexuality.
5. The game was too hard for me? Please, that’s a get out of jail free card that you’re playing there. “I think you hated it just cos you were crap at it!” Anyone can say that and not have to worry about proof.
6. "Look at me, I can't get past the first level, boo hoo hoo, Mommy come change my diaper, that bad guy scared me, waaaaa, waaaaa!!!!" I can’t believe you’d type something like this that would embarrass you so much. At least I assume it embarrassed you because I’d never dare type something like that.

At the end of the day, I posted an honest review. It was my honest belief and I am surprised there aren’t more average reviews of the game. Mine’s the lowest at 6 / 10. Consider this, 6/10 isn’t a bad score for a game. It’s not amazing but it’s enough to warrant a short play thru before getting bored.
Finally, the difference between me and you was I didn’t get personal.
Auto

From :
"Michael Coy"
Add michaelbob10@hotmail.com to My Messenger Contacts.

To :
auto2112@hotmail.com

Subject :
BRILLIANT review on perfect dark my friend

Are you stoned? Writing a review on a game you have hardly played? God I thought people like you would learn by now, IF YOU HAVE HARDLY EXPERIENCED THE WHOLE GAME THEN DON'T WRITE A FUCKING REVIEW ON IT!!!

Auto: But... but.... soldier of fourt.......
Me: Shut up

*Slaps Auto*

Stoopid a-hole

Ahoy Michael,

I have played Perfect Dark a lot, even at that time when I posted the review. Just because I said I played it for the first time in my mate's didn't mean i played it for 30 seconds. I was in there for a good few hours playing the game and didn't enjoy it one bit. He urged me to keep playing because I loved Goldeneye but Perfect Dark felt like a carbon copy with nothing new to offer.

Auto: But... but.... soldier of fourt.......
Me: Shut up

*Slaps Auto*

Stoopid a-hole

This just made me realise exactly the kind of person you are. If you haven't heard of the phrase 'elitist', I urge you to look it up. And think about it very carefully.

Auto

I thought you all might enjoy that so I posted them. There really ARE people out there who treat videogames, films, songs, like it's a matter of life or death. Be warned and don't fall into the same trap.